


Hodnes laik kwelnes

by tinywatermelon



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Clexa, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-16
Updated: 2015-03-16
Packaged: 2018-03-18 03:55:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3555134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tinywatermelon/pseuds/tinywatermelon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set after 2x15 pt. 2. Clarke´s people are free, and the Mountain Men are all dead.  <br/>Clarke struggles to not fall into Lexa’s arms as she tries to confront her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hodnes laik kwelnes

**Author's Note:**

> English is my second language, I’m sorry if the grammatical things are wrong… I don’t have a very large vocabulary… And this is also my first fanfic :o Because Clexa is so worth making a fanfic for!  
> 
> Hodnes laik kwelnes - Love is weakness

«Clarke, where will you go?», Clarke can hear Bellamy talk to hear, but her concentration is another place. 

 «Clarke, please stay with us», Bellamy is begging, and his face looks so weak now. 

 «I don’t know where I will go, but I can’t stay here. Look after them for me Bellamy, they respect you». Before Bellamy gets to react 

Clarke goes in for a hug and gives him a kiss on the cheek and walks in to the woods. 

-

A soft breeze flies trough Clarke’s blond hair, the woods aren’t as frightening as it were before. Her lips are dry and she can feel her legs failing her, she has walked two days with almost no sleep and no water.  Suddenly she can hear a river nearby and her legs are at full power again and she runs as fast as she can to the source of the sound.  As she arrives the river her hands fumble for her canteen to fill it up with water. You can she her bruised knuckles and theres still blood on her hands, literally and metaphorically. Clarke looks at her hands and gets filled with anger, hatred and betrayal. Lexa. Lexa is the only thing Clarke has had on her mind the two last days.  Of course Clarke understand why Lexa did what she did. Clarke did just the same two days ago with the Mountain Men, she did what were necessary to get her people back. But even though she understood, Clarke wanted something from Lexa, she just didn't know what yet. Clarke thinks to herself - I want answers, I want you to beg for forgiveness, I will not be weak, I will not show love. When these thoughts were out of her head she immediately went in the direction for Polis. 

-

After three days Clarke finally arrives in Polis, but immediately regret the decision of coming. She recognizes the smell of blood, tree and metal. Clarke walks to one of the guards, she recognizes him from when Clarke’s and Lexa’s people had an alliance. The guard clearly sees who Clarke is and lets her through.  She walks to Lexa’s tent and finds Indra standing outside, she let out a little snort and stares at Clarke.   

«Hello, Clarke kom Skaikru, what do you want?», Indra says in a very foreign voice, a tone Clarke heard when she first talked to Lexa. 

«I want to talk to your Commander», Clarke demands.

Indra does what Clarke demands and opens the tent. Clarke thanks Indra and bends her head and sees Lexa sitting on her throne and holding tight to her dagger. 

«Clarke», Lexa says with a soft tone. 

«Commander kom Trigedakru», Clarke answers monotone. 

«Don’t do this Clarke», Lexa begs. 

Clarke stares at Lexa and the black mask where she hides her feelings behind. By looking at her Clarke gets overwhelmed by the sight and wants to either punch her or kiss her.

Lexa tries to smile at Clarke but fails miserably, and she feels sick. She sees the scars the war did to Clarke through her eyes, and the scars Lexa made. 

«We killed them all», Clarke says stern.

  Lexa nods, «I’ve heard». 

The brunette sees the other girls pain and walks over to her. As soon as Clarke sees this she takes a step back and Lexa stops.

  «What I did was for my people Clarke, I know you understand why», Lexa says in an even softer tone than before. 

«As part of the deal my people can help you with the reapers».

Lexa sighs, «Clarke, stop» 

The two girls look at each other, after a couple of minutes Clarke has had enough. She unscrew her canteen and fills her hand with water, and shorten the distant between them. Clarke slowly begins to wash off Lexa’s warrior mask to reveal her true face. She looks at Lexa’s confused green eyes as the black paint begins to come off, and after some minutes she sees a vulnerable teenager trying to avoid her gaze.  Clarke’s face begins to soften and she can feel the tears behind her eyes begins to fall down her cheek.  Lexa steps closer to Clarke and takes her gentle hand in hers. 

«Clarke-», Lexa begins, but Clarke cut her off. 

«You broke my heart Lexa», Clarke begins to shiver and Lexa can feel the other girl need of her. 

Lexa steps even closer to the girl and tries to comfort and embrace her, but Clarke takes a step back again. Clarke thinks to herself - I can’t do this, this was a mistake. I will not fall in her arms and pretend everything is okay, because it isn’t okay.  Clarke straighten up and rubs her tears away from her cheek. 

  «Love is weakness», is the last words Clarke says as she walks out of the tent and leaves the grounder camp.


	2. Ai hod you in

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic is now suddenly a cliché... And I hate clichés... well..  
> Virgin fics are often not very good..eh.eh...

Lexa takes a deep breath and hears Indra walk in.   «Heda?» 

«Leave me, I need to be alone», Lexa says under her breath trying not to cry. 

Indra nods, and walks out.

Her eyes are swollen and her head aches with thoughts of Clarke. Love is weakness. Love is weakness. Love is weakness. Lexa repeats to herself, but it doesn't work. She needs Clarke more than ever, but she ruined it. Everything but Clarke is weakness.  Lexa’s fingers touches her lips and she remembers Clarke’s soft lips against her own, and how she wasn’t ready. I can wait, Lexa wanted to say, but they got interrupted. It seems like forever since their kiss, but it was only a week ago. 

-

Clarke wanders around and enjoys the change of scenery, and tries to avoid thinking about Lexa. She looks up, directly at the sun before her eyes can’t take the brightness anymore.  Suddenly her hand goes to her gun when she hear noises in the bushes. It’s a squirrel, Clarke laughs, it’s just a squirrel she repeats to herself. Then she remember the last time she ate and how hungry she really is.  Her hand goes for the dagger in her belt as she sneak up on the little animal. 

After her kill Clarke tries to find a place to make fire and take the night. She finds a huge three to sleep under and leaves her things to find twigs that she can make fire with.  
 Food has never tasted better than this, Clarke thinks to herself as she makes herself comfortable under the three.  After a little while she falls asleep with her right hand on her gun. 

\- 

The blond girl wakes up with birds sining all around her. She rubs her eyes to get her morning mood out of the system. Her canteen is almost empty and she’s thirsty. But from nowhere she can hear light sneaky steps, and this time it is not an animal. Fast Clarke pulls her gun up and aims it wildly at the source of the sound. 

«Clarke», Lexa comes out from behind a big rock. 

The brunette has no warrior paint, and it looks like she haven’t slept much. She must have come alone, because Clarke can’t see or hear any others. The blond puts her gun back in her belt again, and she ignores Lexa and begins to pack her backpack.

«Clarke, please», Lexa walks towards the blond girl. 

«Love is weakness, isn’t that right?», Clarke chokes at the words and tries her best not to cry again. 

«I thought love is weakness, but my love for you only strengthen me», Lexa looks embarrassed by admitting this. 

Clarke feels warm inside her, the same feeling she got when they kissed. But she has to be strong, and she shakes the feeling off. She replies with a harsh tone in her voice, a much harsher tone than she expected;

«Then why did you leave me?». 

«I had to, it was for my peopl-» 

Clarke cut her off, «I didn’t ask why you left my people, I asked why you left me?», the blonde girl was almost shouting. 

Lexa looked down at Clarke’s almost empty canteen, and after minutes she finally replied; «I thought with my head, not my heart».

Clarke frowns, «That’s not a good enough answer» 

Lexa could now feel her knees failing, she just wanted to embrace this wonderful girl she loves. The brunette studied Clarke’s face, she now understands that the other girl wants to see her take down her walls. And for Clarke, this was worth a try.    
At first Clarke looks confused as the Commander in front of her begins slowly to take off her armor and lays all her weapons on the ground.  In two minutes the brunette stood with only pants and a loose sweater, clothes that looks rather dirty.

«I love you, Clarke of the Sky People», Lexa finally says.

The feeling Clarke got was impossible to shake off, and she finally understands what she was searching for. The brunette embraces the blond girl who are walking towards her. First their noses touch as Lexa cups the blond princess, and Clarke puts her hands around her waist. She explores the brunette, and she feels her muscular body against her.  They both look deeply into each others eyes, and just before their lips meet Clarke pulls slightly away. 

«Ai hod you in, Lexa kom Trigedakru»

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ai hod you in - I love you


End file.
